Sometimes I think being a woman is just plain hard. We feel so much pressure to perform and look perfect. And social media helps nill with this. If our kids don’t fit the realm of “normal” we feel like a failure. If our child is struggling socially or academically, we put it all on our shoulders and live in shame. Maybe our marriage is struggling. And then of course we have the dumbest thing ever, hormones, and we have to deal with that on top of everything else. Hormones are REAL THINGS that make us go crazy!! So basically we are screwed from the womb. So many strikes against our precious female form.
When I struggle, I feel less than. I don’t want anyone to know because I feel shame that I can’t keep my stinkin life together in a pinterest perfect way. I struggle to be a good mom, a good wife, a good friend. I struggle to not say stupid things ALL OF THE TIME!! And I mess up often. I mess up in all the ways. Mostly with my kids. And with my mouth. I feel shame in this. The last thing I want to do is tell other people about it. I don’t want to share my “yuck” with others because I fear that I will be judged and looked down upon. I fear that my words won’t matter anymore because I have failed in such great ways. We need to embrace the struggle. It needs to be ok for me to say that my kids are driving me crazy. That I messed up and yelled and screamed and lost it. It needs to be ok for me to say that parenting all of these kids is super hard and sometimes I feel so alone. It needs to be ok for ALL OF US to voice our hard. Whatever we are going through we have to be able to share it. And we should NEVER EVER BE SHAMED OR FEEL SHAME because we shared. We need to create a safe place to share our struggles with each other. It is also important to find the people that surround you that are safe to share with. We can BE SAFE for someone else. And there should also BE SAFE people for us. It has taken me years to figure this out. It has taken me digging myself out of my own shame pit in order to be well enough to be someone else’s safe person. You guys, let’s be a woman who others can confide in and trust. Let’s break down all the barriers and just love. There is no shame, there is no guilt, just grace. Let’s speak truth to one another. So you messed up, so what. There is forgiveness and grace, his mercies are fresh each morning. Your are BELOVED, UNIQUE, WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, PERFECT. No matter what. And don’t let anyone speak lies over you.
Truth is we are nurturers and lovers and we fix all the problems. We are funny and smart and strong. We have a voice and it is important and should be heard and respected. Struggles make us greater, they teach us, give us experience to help others. Struggles suck to go through but we come out with great clarity on the other end. I pray that as women we band together to support each other, to love each other. I pray we never judge, we never shame, we never belittle. I pray we don’t put on perfection each day, we don’t act like our life is all a bed of roses. I pray we help each other up, out of the lies and into the truth. Our father in heaven is SO FOR US, he loves us with an everlasting love. He went to the cross so that we could live each day in freedom and joy. He wants us to live knowing and believing that we are worthy, incredible, amazing women. No more condemnation, no more shame. Let’s embrace the struggle together with truth and dignity, lifting each other up so high that God’s goodness pours over us.
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do because it was weakened by the flesh, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh to be a sin offering. -Romans 8:1-3