Wild and crazy. Over the top. Brutal. Sometimes life just hands it to us. Sometimes there are months that are just harder than others. Where you are just plain exhausted all of the time. You are struggling to keep your head above water. It takes discernment to know whether or not this is God’s plan for your life. Is God asking you to be out of balance for a bit for the kingdom or are you just doing it to yourself? Just ask, he will tell you. 🙂 I’m not sure everyone would agree with me, but I think that sometimes God gives you a dose of hard, a little struggle. It’s that dependence thing I talked about in this post. The tricky thing is walking through the crazy well.
Because Matt is FOR the farmers, our falls are brutal. They are just insanely hard. (Side note: This is not a complaint, just sharing our experience. We truly believe God has blessed us with this job and we are honored to work at it with all we have.) Matt is gone all day every day for a REALLY long time. For real, it’s just a couple months, but it feels like forever. You farmer wives know what I’m talking about!!! Tonight I sat down and told him, I’m just done. I am sick of taking care of ALL THESE KIDS by myself!! They are driving me nuts!! And the thought came to my mind; we are so incredibly blessed and our hard is NOTHING compared to so many other families. So how do we walk through the crazy well?
First, admit it and be ok with it. Be confident in the work the Lord has called you to. And then rely on him and prayer and community. Look to Jesus for strength and grace. This season Jesus has really spoken to me by gently reminding me over and over how stinkin blessed we are. He has gently whispered, remember your boys’ mama; yeah she struggled to feed her kids. And you think you have it rough. Or that single mom over there, she has no husband ever to help her. This season God has just blessed me with compassion for all the families who struggle with the crazy that life hands them. I have realized that no matter how hard my life feels, the reality is it is incredibly rich with comfort in every way. And maybe because my life experience has had some struggle, I am able to have eyes wide open to see other’s hard and to try to walk beside them.
In the end, I long to deal with the crazy in a way that glorifies the Lord. He is mighty and powerful. It’s just all about JESUS.
And the wine. The wine helps too. 🙂 Just joking, kind of. 🙂 It’s been a long fall friends…..
Really and truly, Jesus has broken my heart for what breaks his, he is constantly showing me need all around me. He is speaking to me about the goodness of my life and helping me to be grateful through the crazy seasons. We can walk through any season well with our friend Jesus at our side.
The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him. -Psalm 28:7